Everything I’ve learned about COVID-19

Here’s what I’ve learned about Covid-19 from my friends, family, and colleagues, all of whom are experts in their own way, but none of whom are epidemiologists.

  • We’re overreacting
  • We’re underacting
  • The virus will never kill as many as the flu
  • The virus will eventually kill more than the flu
  • The virus came from people eating bats
  • The virus came from people eating snakes
  • The virus came from people eating human flesh
  • The virus was designed as a weapon by the Chinese
  • The virus was designed as a weapon by the Americans
  • The virus was designed as a weapon by the Israelis
  • The Trump Administration and the Republicans are spreading this hoax to discredit the Democrats in retribution for the Mueller Report and the impeachment
  • The Democrats are spreading this hoax to undermine the President, following failed attempts with the Mueller Report and the impeachment
  • The media is over-hyping the situation
  • The media is being denied information by the government
  • The Illuminati are behind it
  • The NBA team owners knew months in advance
  • Bob Iger knew months in advance
  • Donald Trump knew months in advance
  • Nancy Pelosi knew months in advance
  • Just wipe your hands, you don’t need to wash them with soap every time you touch something.
  • Washing your hands doesn’t work. You need to bathe in scalding hot water. Yes, a family member actually recommended this

And this is why I’m still going to the World Health Organization for my updates.

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